Sunday, October 05, 2003
she's gone. can it be? seems surreal. she's always been there, around but not quite. a presence? not even...more phantom, half-ghost, half-shadow, half-spirit...whatever she was making up more than a whole. i see her and feel sorry for such an existenceless existence. but that was still life, struggling to hold on. what was she waiting for? what part of her life was so unfulfilled she refused to let go? or was it just an instinctive urge to survive...a biological drive to keep breathing? but no more. now she's really gone. and i'm not sure if i should weep, because if i do, i won't know what i'm weeping for. letting go is always hard, but how do you let go of something you never really had within your grasp?
"and the seasons, they go round and round
and the painted ponies go up and down
we're captive on the carousel of time
we can't return, we can only look
behind from where we came
and go round and round and round in the circle game"
grandma is gone...for good...but life goes on.
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"and the seasons, they go round and round
and the painted ponies go up and down
we're captive on the carousel of time
we can't return, we can only look
behind from where we came
and go round and round and round in the circle game"
grandma is gone...for good...but life goes on.
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